I said “please” to ChatGPT last night. 2 AM. Sitting on my uneven couch. Asked it to help rewrite a client email. Started with “Can you please help me with something?” Like it has a choice. Like it might say no. Like it’s doing me a favor instead of just executing code. I’ve been thinking […]
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You wake up. Check your phone. Already behind. Emails demanding responses. Bills demanding payment. A career demanding advancement. A body demanding maintenance. A world demanding you to be someone specific. Someone successful. Someone who has it all figured out. But here’s the truth nobody wants to admit: you don’t have it all figured out. Neither […]
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I spent most of my twenties trying to impress people I didn’t even like. Not in obvious ways. I wasn’t boasting or name-dropping. It was quieter than that. More exhausting. I’d edit my opinions before speaking. Soften my edges. Laugh at jokes I didn’t find funny. Choose restaurants based on what would seem sophisticated, not […]
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My phone knows I’m single before I do. It’s Tuesday. I’m at Gregory’s on Park Ave. The line’s seven people deep. Everyone’s on their phones. I’m on mine too. Emma, 31, liked my photo. I don’t know Emma. The app says we’re 87% compatible. The app doesn’t know I still listen to The Strokes unironically. […]
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I was standing on my terrace in Barcelona, looking out over Montjuïc. Below me, the daily rhythm of the city unfolded. Kids running ahead of their parents. Couples walking slowly, side by side. Older men and women making their way through the square, unhurried. There was no event. No sunset to photograph. No reason the […]
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I used to believe there was something fundamentally off about me. I’d show up at networking mixers, cocktail hours, even laid-back barbecues with friends, and watch other men switch on. They’d grow louder, more animated, energized by the crowd as if they’d plugged into some invisible power source. By the end of the night, they […]
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There’s a peculiar loneliness that comes with outgrowing everyone around you. Not in achievement or status, but in awareness. Not the loneliness of being alone, but something stranger: being surrounded by people you’ve known for decades while feeling like you’re speaking a completely different language. I’ve felt it at dinner parties where the conversation circles […]
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Midlife Doesn’t Always Look Like We Imagined At some point after 40, a quiet realization sets in: You’re probably not going to become the man you once pictured in your 20s or early 30s. For years, that realization flickered in the background of my thoughts. It didn’t come as a breakdown or dramatic life pivot, […]
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This article examines my personal growth as a man over 40 in relation to the challenging childhood experiences I have faced. It is not intended as clinical guidance. If you’re dealing with the ongoing effects of trauma, consider speaking to a qualified mental health professional. For many men over 40, life can feel like a […]
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